Last weekend while hanging around my cousin and his two kids, one of them took a real interest in Miss S, or more to the point Miss S’s lunch. I was standing with her in my arms just chatting with the cousin, when his little girl all of a sudden caught a glimpse of my chest. Not unclothed or anything - it’s just that I had been holding S close to my chest. So she sees my chest and literally recoils a bit. She actually steps back with a “whoahhhh” look on her face and says “Does she need to nurse?!” and points at my chest. Admittedly they were quite ginormous and milk filled - but to step back in horror at the size? Geez. Anyway the next words out of her mouth after I agreed that Mis S might need to nurse was “Can I watch?” Hmph. I think not.
The way i think… August 27, 2007
My thought pattern this morning upon waking:
…I love my daughter. She sounds so cute cooing in her crib. what do I have to do today?…go to work. I have to pay our bills too. Better get D’s check into the bank today so I can pay the mortgage bill. I need stamps. Can’t mail the bill without stamps. I’ll get him to pick up stamps. I didn’t need stamps to mail a card last week though. I sent my coworker’s card through the interoffice mail. How is she doing I wonder? It’s been 2 weeks since her boyfriend died of cancer. melanoma. My dad died of melanoma. (I now picture what he looked like the day he died). tears start. I wonder if he was scared? he must have been….I hear my daughter playing in her crib.
I go to her.
A worry August 24, 2007
When Miss S is older and calls me to her room in the middle of the night because she thinks something is in her closet or under her bed, How am I going to hide from her that her Mommy is also scared of the thing in the closet…or under the bed?…How will I open that door without shaking and running screaming for her bed to hide, to prove to her that there really is nothing in the closet. Because Mommy believes in the boogey man to…she really does….I really do.
Overheard in the bathroom… August 24, 2007
Girl with ponytail pulled slightly to the side with a flower bobby pin placed just so for a flirty touch - enters the handicap stall and addressing her friend with a yellow, red , and green stripped headband: “Dude. Why do they make handicap stalls so big? They could totally fit 2 handicap stalls in here!”
Girl exits stall and her friend enters: “You are totally right. You could fit 2 stalls in here. Dude did you notice the tiles on the wall are rasta colored?” (note the colors of her headband)
Friend looks at the bathroom wall: “Yeah. They totally are.”
Please please please don’t let my daughter grow up dumb like that…please.
naked August 17, 2007
Miss S saw her Dad totally naked yesterday, dripping wet just out of the shower and waiting for us to bring him a towel. Miss S took one look at him and burst out laughing…hysterically…she would bury her face in my shoulder with her little 8 month old arms flailing with mirth and then glance back at him only to burst into hyserical laughter again.
I would have laughed to but I don’t think his ego could have handled it 
better? August 3, 2007
I thought the last pic I posted of XianFern was cute…but she wasn’t pleased…is this better for ya?
camping August 3, 2007
So here is a picture of XianFern (sitting on her lazy ass) and Blogless on our camping trip to White Lake. XianFern said it well in her blog. I definitely had a few moments of melancholy after returning from the trip. It probably didn’t help that I was coming home to dinner with D’s ex-girlfriend (not the ex-wife but the ex from before her). It actually turned out to be a pretty good night considering there were lots of comparison stories of D and his family and plenty of other stories to show me that she really really did know him well. Whatever - I still actually enjoyed her company after I got over feeling like an insignificant bug (she’s a professor at a good school). Anyway…back to the camping trip. What Xianfern neglected to mention is that the smokin hot guy in the next campsite over was actually a man the height of me, which is not much, who was drunk (he suggested that we say to any bears that come near us “stay away from me motherfucker” - sage advice), and major form of communication was to give us a double thumbs up sign. Plus…he was ugly. She also negelected to mention that at midnight while having a nice leisurely walk around the campgrounds with some delish sangria I had made, she starts taking off at full on walk/sprint with no warning, having decided we were being hunted by a bear. Next thing we know she’s chucking the fruit from her sangria into the woods (maybe so he loses the scent) and yelling at me to keep up. We were having a nice walk and she had to go and get us all freaked out She instantly felt safe again once we were back in our campsite - the exact place where the bear was spotted the first time…well 2 sites over, but still funny to me.
Anyway we had a blast, and though I couldn’t wait to get home to Miss S, I needed that reminder of what it’s like to be my own person, not just an extension of an 8 month old.
